Managing Anxiety: Finding Your Safe Space

We all have moments in life where it feels like things are spinning out of control.  We focus too much on the intricacies of what lies ahead of us. In doing so, we lose ourselves in the process. I’m easily overwhelmed, and often feel I’m stuck in a constant brain fog. With feelings of worry, fear, and nervousness.  

I shutdown completely, and rummage around aimlessly through my mind.  I get anxious about tasks I need to get done or even going out in public. Just hearing the word anxiety, makes me feel uneasy. 

I’m a highly sensitive person, so I feel things deeply and emotionally in any given situation or environment. I could be at the grocery story, panicking over which avocado I should get. Is it too ripe? Is it too mushy? A list of questions and possibilities runs through my mind, and I can’t decide. Decision fatigue at its finest ladies and gentlemen. 

It’s overwhelming for me when I’m experiencing anger, irritability, and annoyance. I’m mentally exhausted from the heaviness I feel on my shoulders. Certain situations create a type of hardship that’s hard to manage. I develop symptoms such as over-heating and getting sweaty palms, or shakiness because of the anxiety and overwhelm. It’s too loud in my brain, and I need to find a quiet place to subside the noise, and endless chatter.  

In those moments, where I feel that heavy burden, I need to find a space to regain my sense of control. There, I can exhale the anger and frustration. There, I can find the privacy I need.  In these quiet moments of solitude, I’m allowed the opportunity to breathe and try and to shift my energy. I’d rather be alone in my emotions, instead of having others witness my outbursts and meltdowns.  

I need to create a safe environment to process my emotions. I can do this without the external pressure of being around people at that given time. Sometimes, I just close my eyes, take a few deep breathes, and allow myself to release what I’m feeling. 

I’m rather fragile on the inside. I can cry at the drop of a hat. I yell on instinct, and when I’m angry, I see red. There is no in-between. This happens automatically when things upset me. I can’t control which emotion takes over at that time. I have to step away from the situation entirely, and go through the motions. I’m not trying to run from my problems. Instead, I’m handling them carefully. I do it at my pace and use techniques that suit me best. 

This is the key to moving forward. Whenever I obtain the satisfaction of emotional release, I regain my clarity and strength. I’ve come to realize that suppressing my feelings only builds frustration and stress over time. Instead, I need to be present in that moment and take the reins and control of my mind again. 

I realized that I have the freedom to retreat to a quiet spot, when I’m feeling doubtful and uncertain. I used to think that I owed it to everyone to show up, be present, and stick through it.  Even in those times of discomfort, I would go along with the crowd.

But now, I don’t apologize for stepping away. I’m taking care of my mental health.  It is not a weakness, or flaw. it’s a powerful act of maturity and self-preservation.

“I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling.”

Frida Kahlo