Why Letting Go is Essential for Personal Healing

I’ve been on my healing journey for a while now, and I’ve realized that it changes you.  It teaches you to see the world, and yourself, differently.  What once felt comfortable and familiar might not fit anymore.  And sometimes that means outgrowing the people you used to have a strong relationship with.  

I’ve always been one to hold onto relationships for as long as possible.  For me, once I form a connection with someone, I do everything in my power to nurture it and save it.  I don’t like losing people who were a significant part of my life, but sometimes it’s necessary for self-growth.  

I used to tell myself that letting go meant failure, that distance meant I was being cold or disloyal.  But truthfully, my healing releases what no longer aligns with my growth.  Even when it hurts to let go.  It’s been a long, tedious road to get to this point, but I’ve realized that it’s what’s best for my mental health. 

I’ve started the process of doing inner work—setting boundaries, finding my voice, and finally learning to love myself.  Unfortunately, not everyone understands this.  I feel people are attached to the version of myself that doesn’t speak up and that says yes to everything.  I don’t blame them because I gave off that impression for so long, but still, when you change, it can feel threatening to those who preferred the old you.  

I’ve had to let certain people go because they either don’t support my journey or are holding me back from growth.  Sometimes, I don’t even feel guilty about doing it because if a friend or family member doesn’t show support, then I know the love was never there to begin with. In my opinion it’s their loss and my gain.  I don’t have to drag around someone who doesn’t care just because I have a hard time letting go.  

Outgrowing people doesn’t always mean you love them any less.  It just means that you’re honoring and respecting the person you are becoming.  It means that I’m no longer chasing validation or force connections that drain me.   

Truthfully. not every relationship is meant to last forever.  I want to be able to evolve and make space for what’s next.  Not dwell in the past or fear letting go.  I’m choosing myself without the guilt or shame I usually would experience, and that to me is incredible self-growth.  

“You will evolve past certain people. Let yourself.”

Mandy Hale