pasta with parmesan cheese and pepper
Soul Kitchen

Navigating a New Relationship with Food

A Soul Kitchen Sunday Reflection on Food, Appetite, and Finding Comfort Again

When Food Started Feeling Different

Lately, my relationship with food has changed drastically. I used to eat three meals a day, plus snacks in between, but now my hunger has been curbed. I either don’t get hungry at all, or I get to a point where decision fatigue rears its ugly head and I don’t want to cook anything. This is very new to me because food has always been something I leaned on for energy and moments of peace and comfort.

The Weight of the Day

My moods have been shifting a lot lately. I’ll usually wake up in a decent mood, but as the day progresses, anxiety emerges and occupies my mind, my thoughts, my physical energy—it’s exhausting. By the time dinner rolls around, I have no desire, no energy to cook. Most days for me recently have looked like running on caffeine, skipping breakfast and lunch, and trying my best to eat dinner. I know I have to eat something, whether I’m hungry or not.

Trying to Understand What Changed

I think this dramatic change with food stems from medications that curb my appetite, along with constant distraction and focusing on things that make me happy throughout the day, like writing on my blog. It’s something that helps with stimulation when I feel bored or restless. The rest of my time is spent working my job as a caregiver every day. So, my blog gives me something to hold onto when I need to stay busy and occupied.

But I don’t like this change in my relationship with food because it’s unhealthy. I’m not treating my body with the care and attention it needs. I keep trying every day to eat more little by little, but it’s been challenging. Still, one thing is always certain—dinner will happen in some form.

What I Can Manage Right Now

On days like this, I’ve been learning not to force myself into what I think I should be eating. Instead, I try to focus on what actually feels possible.

Not elaborate meals. Not pressure. Just something simple I can follow through with, even when my energy is low or my mind feels full. It’s less about cooking “properly” and more about choosing something that feels grounding enough to get me through the moment.

And lately, that usually means going back to simple meals I know I can manage.

Simple Meals I Keep Coming Back To

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Photo by Klaus Nielsen on Pexels.com

Lately, I’ve been turning to simple meals—pasta, a baked potato, a rice bowl. Anything that doesn’t require too much of my energy. One meal I turn to often is Cacio e Pepe. It’s one of my favorite pasta dishes, and honestly, it’s what I crave in those moments. It’s always been soothing and comforting, and it gives my dinner a little extra punch with the spice of black pepper. You can’t beat pasta served with parmigiano and pepper. It’s a less-than-five-ingredient dish.

Cacio e Pepe

A simple, comforting Cacio e Pepe made with just pasta, black pepper, pecorino, and salt. It comes together in minutes, creating a creamy, peppery sauce that feels warm, grounding, and effortless.
Course dinner, Main Course
Cuisine Italian

Ingredients
  

  • Spaghetti or tonnarelli if you have it
  • Pecorino Romano cheese finely grated (parmesan works if needed)
  • Freshly ground black pepper
  • Salt for pasta water

Instructions
 

  • Bring a pot of salted water to a boil and cook your pasta until al dente.
  • While the pasta cooks, toast a generous amount of black pepper in a dry pan over low heat for 1–2 minutes to release its aroma.
  • Reserve about 1 cup of pasta water before draining.
  • Add the hot, drained pasta to the pan with the toasted pepper.
  • Remove from heat, then slowly add grated cheese while tossing constantly.
  • Add small splashes of reserved pasta water as needed until it becomes creamy and glossy.
  • Keep tossing until the sauce coats the pasta evenly.

Notes

Tip

The key is heat control and pasta water—too hot and the cheese clumps, too little water and it won’t emulsify into a sauce.
Keyword cacio e pepe, food, pasta

That’s it. The perfect comfort meal.

I’m taking it one meal at a time right now, but I know I’ll get my relationship with food back on track. It’s just a matter of time, patience, and showing up for myself again. And with a dish like this, it reminds me that cooking doesn’t have to be complicated to feel good. It can be simple, grounding, and something I come back to when I’m ready.

What does nourishment look like for you right now—not in an ideal sense, but in your actual, everyday reality?

“You can’t heal what you refuse to acknowledge.” — Unknown

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