Reflections on a Year of Change: Finding Happiness

Oddly enough, my life today is exactly what I had pictured a year ago. I knew then that I was struggling, and I knew the following year would be no different. Yes, it is negative thinking and foreshadowing, but I’m more of a realist than I thought I was. I was very aware of my struggles last year. This awareness forced me to confront the reality I was living in.

I was in such a low point this time last year. It was difficult to picture anything ever getting better. I had zero motivation. I had zero interest in doing things that usually made me happy. I also had zero reactions of wanting to improve the situation. I felt trapped in a cycle of despair. Every day blurred into the next without any change. I essentially felt as though this was my life, and I’m always going to think and act like this forever. The sense of stagnation was overwhelming, making any glimpse of hope seem out of reach.

I knew that without trying to change things, I would be left in the same predicament. This realization was both frightening and liberating; it turned into a catalyst for action. So here I am now, reflecting on the year’s journey. I have no real career. I have made no new friends. My love life is nonexistent. I lack a clear direction for my future and how I want to end up.

My therapist had asked me, “What is Happiness?” I most certainly can’t define that, for I’ve gone many years without that feeling. In that moment of reflection, I simply said contentment. And, of course, that’s most everyone’s answer. But what does it mean to be content? Is it financial stability? A loving family? Meaningful relationships? There are numerous aspects to what one might consider happiness. This makes the answer both complex and simple.

I will tell you though, that I have found happiness in unexpected ways. This year, I got to know myself on a deeper level. I embarked on an introspective journey. I learned to understand the little child inside me. This child once believed in endless possibilities and dreams. I told her that things will be okay. I explained that life is a series of ups and downs. It’s all part of the journey.

I have a better understanding of who I am, what I want, and what brings me joy. This newfound awareness has been pivotal to my growth. I couldn’t be happier with this progress, as it has opened doors to self-compassion and acceptance.

Despite the challenges that still lie ahead, I can now see the silver linings in my experiences. Each day, I try to acknowledge small victories. These include completing a task I set out to do. They also involve taking a moment to breathe and appreciate the present.

With this approach, I feel more grounded, more resilient, and more hopeful about what the future holds. Every step I take is a step toward a brighter, more fulfilling life. No matter how small the step is, I am grateful for it.

“The future rewards those who press on. I don’t have time to feel sorry for myself. I don’t have time to complain. I’m going to press on.”

Barack Obama