Why I Talk to Myself (And Why It Helps)

I talk to myself.  Out loud.  A lot.  Sometimes it’s a whisper under my breath.  Other times, it’s a full-on conversation.  And yes, I do it in public too.  I try to do it when no one is paying attention, but sometimes I can’t help the tone of my voice.  

For a long time, I thought it was weird.  I’d catch myself mid-sentence and immediately shut down, embarrassed.  I don’t like drawing any unwanted attention to myself, but sometimes I just regulate my emotions.  

I’ve learned that speaking out loud is a coping mechanism for me.  It helps me self soothe in times of uncertainty.  It’s one of the most powerful tools I have for self-regulation, emotional processing, and grounding.  

In a world that often misunderstands neurodivergent behaviors, I want to talk about why talking to yourself isn’t just okay—its actually kind of magical. 

Echolalia & Comfort Phrases

When I’m overwhelmed, I repeat certain phrases like a mantra. “It’s okay.” “You’ll be fine.” “You’ve done this before.”  Sometimes even a word or sound on loop.  That repetition isn’t random—it’s grounding.  It’s echolalia, something many neurodivergent people experience.  It soothes the nervous system and helps regulate emotions when everything feels too loud or too much.

Echolalia has been framed as “odd” or “disruptive,” especially in children—but it’s not.  It’s a form of processing.  A way to find control in the chaaAAos. I still do it, and now I see it as beautiful proof that I know how to take care of myself.

Talking Out Loud = External Processing

As someone with ADHD and Autism, I often think by speaking.  Talking out loud helps me stay on track, make decisions, and sort through emotions.  It’s how I brainstorm, trouble shoot and soothe myself when my brain feels like it’s going in a hundred different directions. 

Whether it’s saying, “okay, first I’m going to shower, and then I’ll start the laundry,” or talking to myself in moments of panic, it isn’t a coincidence—it’s survival.  It’s self-direction and self-compassion in action. 

Reclaiming the “Weird” Things

We live in a world where independence and silence are praised—where talking to yourself is treated like a sign that something’s wrong with you.  But for neurodivergent people, self-talk is often the bridge between overload and calm. 

I’m done hiding it. Talking to myself is how I cope.  How I center.  How I make sense of a world that often doesn’t make sense to me.

I don’t need to explain it anymore. And neither do you.

Here’s Why I Keep Doing It:

• It keeps me grounded during sensory overload.
• It helps me process emotions that don’t have clear words yet.
• It gives my anxiety a softer voice to listen to.
• It reminds me I’m not alone—I have me.

What I Want You to Know:

If you talk to yourself, repeat phrases, or rely on comforting scripts—you’re not strange.  You’re adapting, managing, and doing what your brain needs to feel safe.

“Talking to yourself is one of the most powerful forms of self-care. You’re reminding your nervous system that someone is listening.”

Unknown