Reflections on Growth: A Year of Joy and Struggle

This year didn’t hand me a clean slate or an easy narrative.  Instead, it offered me something more complex: the chance to learn new pieces of myself.

I’ve spent much of this year focused on my mental health journey.  Some days that looked like progress.  Other days it looked like simply getting by.  Writing became my stronghold through all of it.  It gave me somewhere to place my thoughts when they felt too heavy to hold, and it helped me make sense of emotions that didn’t always come with clear explanations.

And through writing, this community continued to grow.  That has been one of the most meaningful gifts of the year.  Knowing that my words resonate, that they make others feel seen, understood, or less alone.  It reminds me why I keep showing up, even on the days when it feels hard.  You matter here.  

The Joyful Moments That Carried Me

Even in a year marked by heaviness, there were moments of pure joy that reminded me why life is still worth celebrating. Some of them were small. Others were unforgettable.

• I saw my favorite band live Linkin Park in concert, an experience that always feels so soul soothing.  I’m deeply connected and I can genuinely feel the music throughout my body.  
• I traveled to Portland and Michigan to visit friends.  The people who feel like home no matter the distance.  It’s always so much fun to be with them and share laughter and stories.  It makes me feel whole again.  Distance truly does make the heart grow fonder. 
• I celebrated the weddings of some of my dearest friends, standing witness to love in its most hopeful form.  It’s deeply heartfelt and inspiring to me. 
• One of my best friends welcomed my “nephew” Hugo into the world, a reminder that new life carries its own kind of magic.  He’s an absolute dreamboat and I can’t wait to meet him in February.  
• And yes, the Dodgers winning the World Series was a highlight I won’t downplay. Watching them repeat a championship brought me pure, unfiltered joy.  Hands down the happiest moment of the year. 

Those moments, while great, didn’t erase the hard ones.  But they did lighten them a bit.  They gave me so hope and joy to hold onto.  

The Weight I’ve Been Carrying

Not everything this year was light.

My mom’s health has declined, and as her caregiver, I feel that weight every single day. Watching someone you love struggle is an ache that lives both outside and inside your body.  We had a few scares this year, moments where fear took over completely, but she’s okay.  Still, the constant uncertainty takes a toll.  It’s exhausting.  It’s heavy.  And it’s something I carry quietly most of the time.

Depression also wove itself through the year.  Some months were darker than others, but it never fully left.  It lingered in the background, shaping my energy, my thoughts, and the way I saw myself.  I’ve learned more about myself than ever before, and yet I still struggle.  Growth doesn’t always mean clarity.  Sometimes it means sitting with discomfort longer than you want to.  That’s what I’ve come to realize.  

And honestly, I still can’t believe how fast the year went. It feels like I blinked and suddenly I’m here, reflecting on it all.

Looking Ahead with Open Eyes

One of the hardest truths I’ve faced this year is how critical I still am of myself.  I question my actions, my words, my presence.  I doubt myself constantly, even when I appear calm and go-with-the-flow on the outside.  Inside, my mind often feels like a cage.

But this coming year, my intention is simple.

• I want to be more comfortable in my own skin.
• I want to stop second-guessing every interaction.
• I want to trust myself more.
• I want to feel less trapped in my own thoughts.

I just want a sense of peace.  

Reflection: I’d Love to Hear From You

What did this year give you? What are you carrying forward, and what are you ready to leave behind?

Here’s to stepping into the next year with a little more honesty, softness, and self-compassion.  Happy New Year! Let 2026 be your best year yet!

“This year didn’t change everything, but it revealed pieces of me I didn’t know I was allowed to keep.” – Unknown